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Mirth Turtle Mirth Turtle Social

Waiting for the next person to call me a tall drink of water so I can say, β€œand Ice Cold as well”

I'm playing corporation games like that annoying man spoke of. And LOSING

Don't tell the stores this but I would pay at least twice what they charge for butter

Accidentally got honey on the cat

The sushi place gave me an extra salmon roll and I got paranoid they were trying to fatten me up and/or launder money by padding expenses in conjunction with their cash discount scheme

Yeah, I don't think I have the personality type to be a fierce, Stringer Bell-type street-level enforcer *a VC comes within earshot* I mean I DEFINITELY have the personality type to

Thinking of turning Mirth Turtle into a lifestyle brand by photographing a bunch of hot people wearing my merch while they hold cats

It took almost nine hours but we crossed the Pacific in the Go plane

https://mirthturtle.com/airline

Air Mirth One – Premier Go Airline

ME: hmm I could treat myself to a game of Noita to relax and have fun MY BRAIN: oh you'd like that, wouldn't you

Trying to refer to my office as β€œthe command center” so I'm more inclined to make money there instead of playing Noita

Charlie looks peaceful here but later he got himself stuck behind an armchair

Charlie wearing a cone and sleeping in the sun

*putting on my... πŸ”’ Unlock

Sometimes if the computer takes an extra long time to do something, I'm like, β€œComputer!!”

Watching a JUUL documentary and getting depressed that I wasn't cool enough to JUUL when Mango was available

If Jigsaw ever put me in a trap device as a cruel lesson, it would probably be related to my egg nog consumption

*handpicking the MOD files for this jukebox* Ah, I'm like a modern day Zach Braff

https://mirthturtle.com/crunchy

Crunchy: Reliable Beats

Got a new haircut and the salon promptly went out of business

Charlie sniffs my face as I steal his good light

A Charlie deluge

He judges you. Charlie caught in the act of being cute. Charlie hides his face while he sleeps.

Got @playerprophet to do an edit-through of Ghostcrime for a revised edition and all her notes are like, β€œdon't capitalize Crime” β€œdon't capitalize Feelings Van”

*becoming normalcore* can you believe THIS is the quality of video I am getting for $14.99 a month I mean COME ON *posts screencap of a movie where a scary doll is killing people*

Love to make software you can use while driving

A bingo card about why I don't like mobile app development.

One day they're gonna find out all the elementary particles are Go positions and my psychoses will be vindicated

My childhood crushes... πŸ”’ Unlock

They waited to restore power until after I'd had my tap water instant coffee

Power's been out all day and I hope the province is going to reimburse me for all the tea lights I'm burning. They're the fucking BEESWAX ONES